It's Zagat survey time again, and you know what that means. "Without compensation or attribution" thousands of "New Yorkers" will be submitting their "pithy comments" to the survey in the hope of contributing to the "greater pool of culinary knowledge."

(What a great racket! Anyone wishing to contribute free content to my blog should feel free to do so. I promise to use your work and pay you nothing. But oh! The glory!)

Though the Zagat guides are generally "slow to react" to culinary trends, which seems "antithetical" to the "fast-paced restaurant world" a "lot of people" (restauranteurs and chefs included) continue to consider them an "authoritative guide," at least in terms of marketing and promotion. That's probably why there's now a "Bronx-centric restaurant recognition campaign" spearheaded by "Borough President Adolfo Carrion, Jr."

Although I'm "not nearly as clever," witty or "impossibly sharp" as the "NYC dining collective," I'll include samples of "my own thoughts" on two "local joints."

Bleu Drawes Cafe
Since pierogi-filled Greenpoint is about as far from Jamaica as you can get, Bleu Drawes provides a welcome spice injection with their juicy jerk chicken and a jammin' jerk club. Their signature dessert pudding is a bit of a soggy mess, but then, one doesn't look to Jamaica for the pastries.

Enid's
Traditionally known more as an overflow recipient of Williamsburg’s hipster bar crowd and the home of line-out-the-door weekend brunch lines, Enid’s year-old “prix fixe” dinner menu dishes up some of the most delightful Southern comfort in the ‘hood. From their sweetly spicy pulled pork to tender blackened catfish sandwiches, every entrée seems cleverly chosen to pair perfectly with beer.

Submit your reviews now, and upon publication, they'll send you your very own shiny, new 2006 Zagat Restaurant Guide in the mail.

Sweet and nutty, warm and buttery, sooji halwa (also known as sooji halva or suji ka halwa) is pudding that transports. With an beguiling saffron color and an intoxicating cardamom perfume, sooji halwa is just one of a collection of sweet Indian desserts with that fall under the halwa umbrella. Eat it for brunch, eat it for dessert. It's rich, comforting and ever-so-easy to make.

Here's two recipes to try out.

Don't have semolina? Use cream of wheat. No cashews? Pistachios or almonds will do. You probably already have everything you need hanging around your pantry. Just remember to use green cardamom rather than the black ones which bring in too much earth and smoke flavor.

And at the top, you'll find enlightenment...

Yeah, maybe most of the world has been watching the Sistine Chapel for a plume of white smoke. My office has been salivating at their screens, counting down the moments to this morning's USDA webcast announcement for the new food pyramid.

Essentially, they've divided the hierarchy into vertical slices of varying widths to represent relative consumption. The slices are color-coded, and you have to check at MyPyramid.gov to get your own, personalized recommendation on what the government thinks you should be eating.

The reactions among the troops here?

"It's stupid!"

"It's terrible information design! The image isn't sufficient on its own. They don't provide labels for the sections, so it's just confusing"

"They tipped the pyramid over and spilled it out all over the place. It's like they're saying, 'hey you figure it out' "

"It's a food pie"

"Well... it takes into account individual people's needs."

"It doesn't tell me why I'm supposed to eat all these grains."

Overall, there's confusion and disappointment. Our nutritionist was the most cautiously optimistic among us.

The bottom line? Eat whole grains, vary your vegetables, focus on fruits, find calcium-rich foods, eat lean proteins, know the difference between fats, and exercise every day. I haven't yet found a mention about remembering to floss and getting eight hours of sleep every night, but I'm sure that's in here somewhere...

A. Wild rock fennel.

B. Briny, Grecian shoreline weeds

C. Exclusive Whole Foods weeds.

D. All of the above.

Yes, it's tax day, and the unsinkable Titanic sunk on this day 93 years ago... but on the bright side, it's Friday, it's Brooklyn Restaurant Week and a mere four days from Ben & Jerry's Free Cone Day. Yay!

Click to find a Scoop Shop near you...

I'm a bit disturbed by the lack of tomato varieties when pears obviously get such good representation (I'm betting the pears just happen to have a good agent. I mean, really... most heirloom-variety tomatoes nail the "unique, pleasurable, high quality gastronomic experience" qualification outright.)

This is a very cool thing nevertheless: Slow Food USA's Food Arc

I see the product sidebar as a sort of eating wishlist for my coming year... mmm....

Ah, Manhattan. Home of retail's most subdivided subdivisions. Just bulbs. Just bagels. Just beagles.

There's something so charming, old-fashioned and "New York City" (not to mention inefficient and frustrating) about travelling from one district to another in search of the three or four components that will complete your Saturday afternoon errands.

So what's with 6th Avenue becoming the chain district? Okay. So it's not *just* 6th Avenue, but in the past three years, the area around 6th & 23rd seems particularly infested with big-business chains. Recent-ish additions include BestBuy, Chipotle, Olive Garden, Outback Steakhouse, Home Depot and yet another Cosi outlet. Within the space of three blocks, these chains join Kinkos, Barnes & Nobel, The Container Store and Bed, Bath & Beyond to create what's now our own little version of the Everywhere, USA strip mall.

I won't claim I'm not a complicit party here. Why, just weeks ago I stopped off in the chain district after work. I purchased drywall screws and three houseplants from the behemouth Home Depot and ate a very tasty Chipotle burrito full of antibiotic-free Niman Ranch meat.

...And that's the problem. The consistency, convenient hours and reliable product lines at the chains are soothing. Not interesting. Not local. Not surprisingly good or surprisingly bad.

There's always an element of perceived risk at an independent. There's probably an equal chance of finding something outstanding or even simply noteworthy. But for the harried and the hurried, the perception of reliability usually outweighs variety, discovery and community.

It's like the Borg. Resistence is futile. Chain stores' inherently deeper pockets mean that within a decade or so, Manhattan's marketplace will fully assimilate like the rest of the nation... we'll be another city draped in chains.

Oh, joy! The James Beard Foundation has finally released something other than bad news. SauteWednesday covers the dish on the JBF's annual food jouralism honors.

Judging by a quick glance at the names, it seems as though there's only ten food journalists in the country worth reading. Which is a poor showing, really.

It's a good thing blogging isn't considered journalism, or I'd have to assume the JFB has a fairly narrow view on what makes food writing sizzle.

A regional specialty?

Cruising through Scarsdale, NY, enroute to Pennsylvania, I had the pleasure of gassing up at the Sheetz convenience store. Coming, as I do, from Truckstopland, where clean roadside bathrooms are rare and gas station food is mythical, I was shocked... shocked, I tell you... at the convenience store Disneyland that was Sheetz.

Initially, of course, I was simply sucked in by the giggleworthiness of the name. (Although MissK was gunning for a pitstop at the equally goofy "Ho Mart"...)


Many thanks to MissK, my semiprofessional hand model.

But lo! What's this? You can put in an order for food on a touch-screen while you fill your tank. Genius! And, as a nice bonus, they mark the low-fat items, just in case you're really not interested in a side of cardiac blockage along with your fuel.


The aisles are alive with the smell of jerky...

Inside, the place was a candy-colored world filled with a robust run of refreshment regulars alongside fast food favorites. And whaddayaknow... the bathrooms were spotless and high-tech — auto-flush, auto-soap, auto-towels. No auto-footrub or auto-stylist, sadly.


Take me down to a place called Fizz City...

Hey, you know, it's not cuisine, but you've gotta stop for gas sometime. Might as well make it fun.

Yes, It's the first gorgeous day of spring in the city. Yes, Danny Meyer's Shake Shake is yummy. No, it's not really worth spending your entire lunch hour standing in line. Three words, people... "off. peak. dining."

Liao Yusheng's Shake Shack post documents New York's hunger for a quality burger and fries.

Expect similar results when Tom Colicchio's 'witchcraft opens up a depot in Bryant park next month. Mmm.... wifi, sunshine and upscale comfort foods.

Teaching an afternoon Earth science class and you can't quite keep the kids' eyes from drooping into post-lunch nap mode? No problem! Just pack 'em full of sugar!

Lesson Plan: EarthMallows

To counterbalance the dreck and drivel out there on the wild wild web, you occasionally run across something that makes you wonder how you ever got along without the internet.

I'm sure everyone's got their own favorite thing, but easy access to over 5,000 menus dating back to 1856 (via TMN) and the terribly helpful and efficient folks at foodtimeline.org sure do the trick for me.

Check 'em out... and if you've got cool tools near and dear to your own heart (or stomach), be a peach and drop me a line!

Somebody please tell me they're kidding about this...

Burger King Manufactures New "Morning Coronary" Sandwich