fishy business

Here's a little behind-the-scenes look at the ways we industry types make decisions about your colon.

Actual email exchange reproduced below. Names have been changed to protect... well, me.

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From: thefishguy
To: missginsu
Subject: escolar

For this new fish, Escolar, I will temporarily use the picture for Alaskan halibut. I will be bringing by some cooked pieces in a few. I have product in house and would like to start selling it today.
-tfg


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From: missginsu
To: thefishguy
Subject: RE: escolar

Just so you know, you can put this item up today, but it won'’t have copy or photos until the next update.
-mg

At this point, thefishguy stops by with cooked escolar samples. They're buttery, juicy and mild, reminiscent of Chilean Sea Bass.

It's 10:30 a.m., but after our first samples, everyone reaches for another bite... and another. One of our group (let's call him 'Frodo') isn't going for it. Frodo is grinning. Frodo looks bemused.

Us: "What, man? Why the face?"

Frodo: "Oh, uh, nothing... heh... I've just, you know... heard things."

Us (no longer chewing, eyes searching for the nearest trash can): "What?"

Frodo (still grinning): "It's nothing."

thefishguy: "Come on! That only happens if you eat a ton of it. You have to eat like... a pound before that happens."

Us (panicked): "What? What?"

Frodo: "Well, they call it the 'Olestra Fish.'"

thefishguy: "It has some indigestible fats that kind of go right through. Some people get intestinal... distress. Hey, wait! Where are you going? It's not like that! I mean, you have to eat a lot of it. Seriously..."


Later that day (after some research reveals that our fishy friend is banned in Japan and California)...

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From: thefishguy
To: missginsu
Subject: No mas escolar

I'm just going to nip this in the butt before it affects a customer'’s. No mas Escolar (aka amoebic dysentery fish).
-tfg


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From: missginsu
To: thefishguy
Subject: RE: No mas escolar
Aw.... it'’s too bad people can'’t be trusted to eat their escolar responsibly.
-mg


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From: thefishguy
To: missginsu
Subject: RE: No mas escolar

Know when to say when!

Friends don'’t let friends eat escolar in copious quantities!
-tfg

I ate about six ounces and yes, I really did experience some of the promised effects. You've been warned. Stay away from the tasty fishie. It's all for the well-being of you and your intestines, folks.